Guardians Of The Polyhedral Dice
Jacks Beer Mat
So I velly, velly dwunk, but had velly important mission. Velly important. Find sacred refilling hip flask.
Anyway, I was out wiv lads, but then some kobolds attacked poor innocent us. Luckily Dragonborn forgot to brush teeth, so stinky breath dealt with kobolds.
So then we went to town and I had a nice drink of Port. Or maybe two. Then we went to this big castle and someone put a silly hole where I was going to get my drink from. However, using my wunderful climbing skills, I got out and then the child-fiddling wizard knocked the nasty goblins in the hole and they got nibbled.
Then I had a drink of goblin grog. Or maybe two. I wasn’t poisoned thanks to my dwarven iron stomach. However, I did feel a little bit tipsy. Then we found a secret door and the little man stabbed the fat goblin. Then as I was suggesting we have a look to see whether the fat goblin had any nice tipple that crazy dragonborn paladin started burning everything.